Simian Liberation Army!

Here's a fun fact from Monkey Tuesday:

The Spanish Socialist Party will introduce a bill in the Congress of Deputies calling for "the immediate inclusion of (simians) in the category of persons, and that they be given the moral and legal protection that currently are only enjoyed by human beings." The PSOE's justification is that humans share 98.4% of our genes with chimpanzees, 97.7% with gorillas, and 96.4% with orangutans.

The party will announce its Great Ape Project at a press conference tomorrow. An organization with the same name is seeking a UN declaration on simian rights which would defend ape interests "the same as those of minors and the mentally handicapped of our species."

According to the Project, "Today only members of the species Homo sapiens are considered part of the community of equals. The chimpanzee, the gorilla, and the orangutan are our species's closest relatives. They possess sufficient mental faculties and emotional life to justify their inclusion in the community of equals."

Attribution: The Spain Herald.

A little bit of background.. Let's get a few facts under our belt. Monkeys (gorillas, chimps, orangs) share somewhere between 96.4 to 98.4% of the characteristics of human DNA. That's impressive. However, Fruit Flies share 68.3% of Human DNA characteristics.

So for the purposes of review:


Monkeys.... GOOOD!


Fruit Flies... BAAAAD!

Hey, along with all these rights we're extending, how about some responsibilities? I want those monkeys to pay taxes, dammit!